Greetings and welcome to the inaugural edition of Catalyst, my Transformational Coaching newsletter. During the coming months I will be sharing some reflections with you from the craft of transformational coaching and how they can be used to improve your life experience.
This month’s focus is on words – and how the words we use shape our actions, feelings and ultimately, our experiences in life.
At a very early age I learned that words carry power, enormous power. “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names can never hurt me.” We all know that isn't true!
We define our world with words; we define ourselves and others with words. Our words then, precede our actions and experiences. Yes, our choice of words is crucial to what we experience in life!
Some words empower us, others are disempowering. Some words enhance our experience, others detract from that experience.
Here are a few examples of empowering/disempowering word pairs:
As we become aware of the words we use, we can begin to see patterns emerge on how we are choosing to relate to our environment and the people in it. Do we see ourselves as courageous or reckless? Do we experience ourselves as grateful or indebted? Do we experience others as grateful or indebted to us? Are we selective or exclusive in our friendships, partnerships or with business associates? Are we thrifty or cheap?
Try this experiment.
Write down 5 words or phrases that represent the most difficult part of your day. (What are the feelings, thoughts, or mental pictures evoked by the words or phrases?) Now write down 5 words or phrases which represent the most rewarding part of your day. (What are the feelings, thoughts, or mental pictures evoked by the words or phrases? ) What is the difference in your experience? Which is the experience on which you would rather focus?
Write down 5 words or phrases that represent the most difficult part of your day. (What are the feelings, thoughts, or mental pictures evoked by the words or phrases?)
Now write down 5 words or phrases which represent the most rewarding part of your day. (What are the feelings, thoughts, or mental pictures evoked by the words or phrases? )
What is the difference in your experience? Which is the experience on which you would rather focus?
Your words and phrases describing both the difficult and rewarding experiences may be true from your perspective, however, it is your choice where you focus your mind and energy.
What are some of the actions you might take if you are focused on the first list? What are the actions you might take if you are focused on the second list? And if the actions are different, wouldn’t your experience be different?
This is why the words we choose and the thoughts on which we focus are so powerful. They are the seeds which grow into our experiences. And if you want more rewarding, positive experiences, then place your focus on the rewarding and positive experiences that are in your life today!
Take time during your week to check in with your thoughts and what you are saying to others.. If you find that you are focusing on the difficult experiences, STOP, RESET, and consciously change your mindset. Focus on that which is uplifting in your situations and with the people in your life. Use your language both in your thoughts and in the spoken word in a powerful and positive way.
The more you become adept at watching your thoughts and discerning of the words that express those thoughts, the more you are able to take actions that make for positive outcomes and shape your life experience in ways you never thought possible.
